NY Knicks No Longer a Basketball Team

Prague Convention demotes team to "dwarf" status.

"While the New York Knicks possess some qualities that are consistent with a basketball team, we have come to the conclusion that they are something else entirely," said Dr. Hiroshi Kyosuke of the University of Tokyo. "It would be more accurate to call the Knicks a dwarf team."

Dr. Kyosuke said it was "understandable" that scientists had assumed that the Knicks were a basketball team for so many years, because they exhibited behavior similar to such teams, such as moving around a basketball court in a seemingly organized manner and hurling an orange spherical object.

"However, they failed to exhibit two properties common to all basketball teams," Dr. Kyosuke said. "Scoring points and winning games."